Dialogue with the Star Anabel
Henryk Skolimowski, February 2008
At the point where the Milky Way almost touches the Vega constellation, there is a big triangle of stars. Within it the intensity of the stars of the Milky Way is perhaps the most intense. Also within this triangle there is a moderately bright star, which I have named Annabel. I have had several conversations with this star. Here is one.
I tentatively started.
H. What am I supposed to do?
A. Long silence, no response. Finally in a muted way I hear: Whatever you do will be ok.
H. I don’t like this response so I say: “Even if I do nothing?”
A. Yes.
H. Even if I do little?
A. Yes.
H. Even if I do a lot?
A. Yes.
H. Even if I do a tremendous lot?
A. Yes.
H. I am perplexed by this time. And try to derive a conclusion. “So nothing and a tremendous lot have the same value?”
A. (Hesitatingly) Yes.
H. It cannot be.
A. It can in our universe… We do not use any of your evaluating terms, etc.
H. But you must have some kind of logic to judge things.
A. No, we don’t.
H. How is it possible? (I say this a bit irritated)
A. It is (and she says it with a certain finality).
H. How is it possible… with all these eons of time you have existed?
A. What eons of time?
H. Well, the universe will be 25 billion years old before it runs its course.
A. The phrase: “25 millions of years” or even “one year” mean nothing to us.
H. (I am flabbergasted and impatient.) What has meaning to you?
A. (long silence, and then) You don’t understand. For us (not bounded by time) one second and 25 billion years is all the same. For us the whole history of the universe (as you call it) is just one flair up. It takes no time, because there is no time.
H. (to himself) I am beginning to understand. But it is so strange to live in the universe without logic, without significance, without time and duration.
A. It is so only for you, human beings, who must have logic, who must evaluate things, who must have all these dramas…
H. Dramas? What dramas?
A. You have invented time, and your consciousness is oppressed by time because you live in fear — in the fear of mortality. You are afraid of death, which is a creation of your consciousness, which has given rise to uncertainty, despair and longing for immortality (another of your chimera). All of this creates these superfluous dramas in your universe.
H. I see, I see….
And I fell in a deep coma of meditation. After a long silence, while still laying on the ground on a thick sheet of plastic, I pleadingly turn to Annabel and I say, really to myself.
H. You and other stars with which I have talked always urged me to transcend, and transcend and transcend — transcend all limits of knowledge and of human understanding. What is the use?
A. (unexpectedly returns to the conversation) What do you mean? What do you want to tell me — in your mournful way?
H. What is the use of having all these insights about time, and about the human dramas — caused by the fears of mortality — if I cannot share them?
A. You may try to share them.
H. You are very naïve. I can hardly share with ordinary people more refined knowledge, which is already accepted by more spiritual people and seers. How will I share these new insights, which are beyond everything that is known and accepted? Yes, with whom will I share them and how?
A. (After a long silence Annabel finally responds) You will share them with yourself. You will not need to hare these insights with anybody. You will be like God. Gods do not need to share their illuminations with others.
H. Perhaps they do, after all…
A. Laughs and says: Have it your way.
I again fall into deep coma and mutter to myself: talking to the stars is a strange and dangerous business. Yet, I also derive an important conclusion from this dialogue with Annabel, which was as follows: For the limitless imagination, there are no boundaries; and there are no things impossible. This conclusion thrills me and frightens me at the same time.
Then I folded my plastic sheet and returned from the mountain valley back to the village. While on the dirt road, I once again looked at the Milky Way, smiled joyously, seeing its myriads of lights — and asked
Why do I owe you?
The Milky way responded: Everything.
I asked another question: And what do you owe me.
The Milky way responded: Everything.